Phase

12/6/2016

Phase 

We only stress right now

We only cry right now

We only feel like shit right now

But really along the way...

We never really cared for y'all

We only try to make things better 

For y'all

Right  n o w 

And forever 

Come and see me for once 

Cause I got what you need 

And not what you want 

Temporarily 

Cause we only make time for those 

Like  y o u 

Which sucks as hell

Second place

12/3/2016

Second Place 

I felt your pain

You felt mine

I saw your vulnerability 

You saw mine

You wanted it from the start

And I tried 

But you came back to her in seconds

How could you just walk away so quickly

When we were trying to express our feelings

How could you say one thing 

And suddenly do the other

You kept going

I couldn't stop you

So I fell back 

You keep her

And I was left 

(3 years) gone by...

9/3/2016

(3 years) gone by...

What took you so long?

3 years...

You finally answered my prayers

Maybe it was because you wanted me to say how I truly felt

For you

For you...

Maybe you wanted me to realize how much you cared for me

Maybe you wanted me to see how much wanted to wait for

The right moment

God’s moment

Our moment

Maybe you wanted me to realize that you love me too.

You walked into my life without me knowing

Thank you.

You came back to embrace me

In your arms

Your warm hugs

Your touch was what I needed

All along

For so long

Thank you.

To the 22 year old me

9/3/2016

To the 22 year old me

You made it.

You are bold. You are powerful. You are beautiful.

It took you 22 years to figure out what the setback was

And that’s okay...

You’re okay

YOU ARE OKAY, love

All you were really seeking for was a love that learned to help you...

Learn to love yourself

You prayed day and night for an endless love from a man

A man that could give you happiness

When you were really looking for that happiness within yourself

But really, it was a love for your own self

A love that said, “I love myself, I love my flaws, I love me,  (I LOVE) all of me.”

With every tear, every ache, and every scar

You just wanted to learn to love yourself

A love that every woman wanted

For themselves

A love that every woman struggled at

A love that every woman craved

For themselves

A love that God wanted for yourself

God did not delay the man that you dreamed of

But to show you how to embrace your bare self

The naked you

All he wanted for you was to see how beautiful you are

With all your scars, your bruises, your tears, your stretch marks

For you see it in your own eyes

To realize how beautiful you are.

You can say it

It’s okay

You made it.

You won the battle.

“I love me, the whole me”

To the 19 year old me

9/3/2016

To the 19 year old me

You were afraid.

You were terrified. You were weeping, every day and every night. You were seeking...

For a love that you wanted for so long

A love that wanted the whole you

The real YOU

The you that you thought could never be loved nor touched

A love that could embrace you

When you fall, when you cry, and when you were at your weakest

A love that holds tight to your flaws

Without hesitation

A love that said, “I love you” to your scars

Your wounds, your bruises, your stretch marks

You prayed each night to ask God when your day will come

A day that made you feel so worthy

So powerful

So beautiful

Yet, so delicate.

A loved that you dreamed of

A love that made you felt special

A love that God knew would be precious

A love that was so unconditional

The only thing that was holding you back

Was the love you had for your own self

Loving yourself was the hardest challenge for you to overcome

A battle that you have been fighting for 

For more than ten years... TEN YEARS

And with those years,

It tore you apart

Into little pieces you could not put back together

What made you think that someone else could do that for you?

Loving yourself was what you were really asking for IN THE END

Truth

03/09/2016

"Truth"

Seeing your face brings me joy

Seeing your face gives me butterflies

Seeing your face makes me want to talk to you more and more

Each and everyday I see you, I want to know you more

I want to know your passions, your dreams, your goals

The feeling of wanting, craving that person's affection

Their love

Their care

Their attention

But when I see you I know that the feeling is not mutual 

Knowing that she's on your mind .... hurts.

Knowing that she's the one you want to talk to hurts.

Knowing that she's the one you want to talk to more and more hurts.

But I know that I can't force this but to let you go.

Love hurts.